Catching Up & Some Tough News

I started this post the other day and didn't get it finished. Then, I had some more to add. So, this will be a bit patchy, but I hope gives an overview of what's been going on at our house over the past couple of weeks and what we have waiting for us in the future. If you know me, you know I like to get the tough stuff out of the way first--at meals I always eat my vegetables first, when cleaning house I always start with the bathrooms, and with my job I started in the ICU at our only level 1 trauma center right out of graduation. I guess I figure it will all get easier after I complete the stuff that is more difficult.

This may be why I struggle so much with our Olivia [not necessarily HER, per say, but her situation]. Just when I think we've got at least a taste of the hard stuff out of the way, there always seems to be something waiting that hurts a bit more than the last. I think it's the roller coaster--ups and downs; highs and lows--that is the biggest struggle.

Not that you need any preface, but over the past few months we've been on a fairly good streak with Olivia--lots of progress at Adam's Camp and the special needs school followed by great progress into a new preschool and pretty good reports there. We were told that academically she was comparable to her peers and her teacher even made the comment that Olivia knew many of the things--letters/numbers/colors--better than some of her peers. Then, at the first of the year, we completely transitioned to the regular preschool. Jason and I have been very wary of this. It just didn't seem, from our perspective that it was the right time to back off. Despite meeting a second time and working to get a better plan, we agreed to go with the experts at the school.

Since January, Olivia has had some behavior problems at school. These are not daily, but they have increased in frequency. At the end of last week, we have found a system that has reduced the negative behaviors some. Jason and I have continued to have a nagging feeling about her being ready for school and on target. It is very difficult for us to keep track of where a child SHOULD be developmentally for Olivia. Jocelyn is not an appropriate comparison as she always ran 6-12 months ahead of everything. We don't expect Olivia to have the same progress, it's just difficult to tell what's normal and what's really behind with her. Two weeks ago, I emailed my concerns to our developmental delay physician. I let her know what had happened at the school and that Jason and I were feeling uncomfortable with this. She found a spot in her quadruple-booked schedule for us to meet with her, PT, OT, and ST for a mini-evaluation. We went yesterday (Monday).

Unfortunately, it reinforced our concerns. The team had significant concerns about Olivia's speech and fine motor skills (writing, primarily). They stated her gross motor was largely intact for her age (but clarified to mean that she had much bigger problems than that so they were focusing on speech and OT). They have recommended that we get her re-evaluated before kindergarten, especially in speech, and also OT should be included. Normally, Olivia would only be re-evaluated every 3 years (which would be at her 6th birthday). They are also recommended scheduling a neuropsych evaluation. At the neuropsych evaluation, they will be looking at IQ and how Olivia learns best as well as evaluating for PDD (Pervasive Developmental Disorder)--see below for symptoms from Wikipedia:

Symptoms of PDD may include communication problems such as:

• Difficulty using and understanding language
• Difficulty relating to people, objects, and events
• Unusual play with toys and other objects
• Difficulty with changes in routine or familiar surroundings
• Repetitive body movements or behavior patterns

I'm not sure what will come out of that evaluation. I don't know that Olivia fits with all of the characteristics above--I would say that she certainly has difficulty using and understanding language, difficulty with changes in routine or familiar surroundings, and repetitive behavior patterns. The other two--unusual play and difficulty relating to people, objects, and events, I do not notice to be such a problem. When we received her 1st IQ score in Louisville last year, we had hoped that it was low because of her age, lack of exposure to the activities they had done, etc. You name it, we wanted to believe there was a reason for it (other than the obvious, of course, that it was real!). Now, we figure it is probably correct and the next one will reflect that as well.

So, all-in-all, yesterday was a tough way to start the week. So, keep us in your thoughts over the next few weeks as J and I try to sort this mess out and make what we hope are the best decisions we can for our little cutie. Olivia and I have had several talks over the past few weeks and she admits that it is very frustrating when she tries to talk. Hearing her say that breaks my heart. After the appointment, I stayed home with Olivia for some one on one time. She had outgrown her shoes so we made a trip to replace them. She picked out some new pink sparkly Mary Jane's that she loves and wants to wear everywhere. We then worked on cleaning out the girls' rooms (closets and everything).

Anyway, enough of that...

• We had a great time at Miles and Lauren's birthday party!!! Thank you, Danny & Cathy for inviting us. The kids had a blast. Jocelyn has already painted and put together her birdhouse. She enjoyed it a lot. The food was wonderful too! Great party :)

• 
• HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM!!!! It's that time of year when we have a lot of birthdays...Thank you so much, mom, for all you do for us. We enjoyed staying over this weekend and visiting--as always, I could eat and eat and eat when I'm at your house :)

• Jason and I started amping up our time at the gym and making healthier choices at home. We are trying out our version of the Body for Life program. Week 1 went well. We'll see how the rest goes. It is difficult to get to the gym 6 days a week (each of us) in the middle of everything else. It took a lot of coordination :)

Olivia just loves playing with Cody :)

• I've been planning Josie's first sleepover. This takes place Friday night and I've got a LOT of cleaning and preparing to do!

• Jocelyn was really into scavenger hunts this week. She hid notes all over the house with clues for the next one and small prizes.

• We came home twice this week to find Cody's play bone wrapped in his potty mat. I'm not sure how he accomplished that feat not once but twice (since it is all flat when we leave), but he managed to make a very nice wrap for his toy.

Anyway, that is some of what's been going on at our house over the past 2 weeks. Hope to be back on here soon :)